Christmas celebration 
And all around the nation 
Won't you stay with me tonight cause 
I'm running out of fight 
And the pagentry is such a bore 
Carolers are singing 
Registers Ka-chinging 
And the presents are in place 
But I'd rather eat some mace 
'Cause the eggnog always makes me sick 
You know how the story goes 
You've seen it all before 
That man is so obese that he can't get out the door 
Christmas to perfection 
I'm begging for some action 
And the ringing in my ears 
Is the sound of Christmas cheer 
And they've knocked me screaming overboard
You know how the story goes
You've seen it all before
That man is so obese that he can't get out the door
Christmas celebration
And all around the nation
Won't you stay with me tonight cause
I'm running out of fight
And the pagentry is such a bore
And the pagentry is such a bore (x4)